Ahaha, wow, I fail. Every since crawling back to LJ, I completely forgot about my whole "gonna keep crossposting" thing. Oi.
Aaanyway. My entry from yesterday, since I've got nothing at the moment other than my own forgetfulness--

I've been having a terrible time of trying to find a graduate program that works for me. The thing that has been most problematic for me is that I wanted not only something in Bioethics, but something that also dealt directly with the legal aspect of it. The only thing I had been able to find before that even came remotely close to what I wanted was the joint JD/PhD in Clinical Psychology between Drexel and Villanova, which wasn't very close at all.

However, my recent interest in co-oping abroad has had me searching overseas for an appropriate program. And now I am almost certain that I've found something that is exactly what I've been looking for. Professional Ethics at Keele University, specifically the MA in Medical Ethics and Law. It's only a part-time degree, but that might actually be to my benefit. If I am able to find a co-op in Staffordshire, since I'd wanted to co-op in the UK, then I might be able to return to that position while taking my modules.

This would be wonderful if it could work out. :3 I need to contact the international coordinator SCDC to get this underway!



While I'm at it, I may as well post my tentative schedule for Winter term:

CS 161 - Introduction to Computing
ECON 201 - Economics I
MATH 101 - Introduction to Analysis
PHIL 101 - Introduction to Philosophy
PHIL 241 - Social & Political Philosophy
PSY 370 - Forensic Psychology

The only thing I'm concerned with at the moment is the honors option I'm seeking for PHIL 101, and that I need to get my advisor to register me for MATH 101 because I can't do it for myself. Also, HAHAHA 20 CREDITS. Just let me die now, plz.

Ever since I learned how to do laundry, I have been avoiding the evil necessity of having to handwash my superdelicates by dragging my laundry to my parents' house to use their machines. But they went to the shore this weekend, so this eventuality sneaked up on me in a rather unpleasant way. But I suppose that if I'd been left to choose, I never would have done it, so unpleasantness was likely unavoidable regarding this matter.

My point with all of this is that I have a newfound appreciation for laundry machines with a superdelicate setting and wish that my landlord would invest in such a machine. It's a bit ironic that I've come to this after withdrawing from my Technology in Historical Perspective class.



Anyway. I can't wait for autumn to really begin. Sure, these last vestiges of summer are pleasant enough, but summer is just too warm to be fully enjoyable for me. There's nothing quite like autumn's cool warmth, as contradictory as that may seem, but it's true - the dying summer sun still infuses the earth with its warmth, enough to last until winter as those first cool days stretch into the season ahead.

I just... I can't fully express how much I love autumn. It's a time for reflection, as you notice the greenery dying around you in reds and golds, only to be reborn as it always is a few short months later, and the cycle continues. Even as things are changing, they remain unchanging in that change, and it's comforting. It's quiet and peaceful, a brief moment of serenity between the hurried hedonistic passion of summer and the frenzied holiday rush of winter. The muted crackle of leaves underfoot and the scent that is distinctly autumn, bonfires and pumpkins and cider - it's a breathtaking, simplistic beauty.

I'm thinking of putting together a mixlist to autumn, to try to grasp at some expression of all it is this season makes me feel. In the meantime, I'd like to share with you all a poem that I adore: "To Autumn," John Keats


Et le vent du nord les emporte
Dans la nuit froide de l'oubli.
Tu vois, je n'ai pas oublié
La chanson que tu me chantais...
- "Les Feuilles Mortes," Jacques Prévert

After a couple months of waiting and whining, I finally had my LASIK done. The procedure itself, I was told beforehand, would be somewhat uncomfortable but otherwise fine. But after the fact, I believe my father told me this only so that I would not turn chickenshit and back out of it. In reality, it freaked me the hell out. Either they didn't give me enough valium (although they gave me more than the normal dosage) or it simply does not have much effect on me, because I was not a happy camper. But fortunately, the numbing solution made it bearable, if not still quite terrifying. Dr Lewis said I performed quite well, so I suppose I couldn't have visibly freaked out that much. Still, that's definitely not something I would want to go through again if I could help it. Being blind, as temporarily as it may be, is by no means a pleasant experience, nor is having your eyelids physically restrained. >_>

Anyway, I am now recovering from the surgery. It's pretty damn amazing being able to actually see without my glasses... even though I can mostly just see distances at the moment. Since my astigmatism was so horrid in my left eye, the curve of the surface of my eye has been drastically reduced, so I need to adjust to my change of visual field. This basically translates to, I can focus on distances fairly easily, but the closer an object is, the harder it is for my eyes to synchronize. So the only way I'm currently able to really see my computer screen is by closing my left eye and squinting with my right. XD It's pretty pathetic, so I'm avoiding it as much as I can for a while.

The only really annoying thing about my recovery is that I need drops of two different solutions in my eyes at four times throughout the day, and I'm crap at doing it myself. Also, I have to sleep with a specially provided set of goggles so that I don't accidentally rub at my eyes in my sleep, but they pinch my nose so I don't like them. Oh well.

On the positive side, I bought four pairs of sunglasses today, and they are pretty damn awesome. :)

And now I'm going back to sleep for a while, since staring at my laptop's screen is starting to strain my eyes.

I've been listening to these songs on repeat for the past couple days. I personally enjoy the first two for how emotionally captivating they are, and the third mostly because of the dark H/D fanvid I mentioned in an earlier post.


"In The Light" - Full Blown Rose

"Breathe No More" - Evanescence

"No. 1 Crush (Gothic Remix)" - Garbage

You know, I honestly do not watch the news very much, and often wonder if maybe I should. But then I catch wind of the latest scandal and remember why I avoid the broadcasting.

In principle, I really do not have any problem with people being furious about Michael Vick's dog fighting investigation. Public outrage at such acts of cruelty is to be expected; I'd be more worried if people weren't horrified. However, demanding that he be suspended for the 2007 season, some even insisting that he ought to be permanently suspended, carries a hint of hypocricy. It's as if these people are blind to the fact that a huge number of professional football players are criminals from across the spectrum - found guilty of major gambling problems, aggravated assault, and murder, among many others. For years, the Cowboys were known for being pretty much nothing but a pack of criminals. Yet they kept their jobs.

If this outrage is a sign of stricter demands to come of ethical behavior for professional football players, then I would have no issue with it. However, I suspect that the public attitude is what it is because it was animals that were hurt, not people. But why? Because it's more acceptable to cause injury to people, who are responsible for their behavior and thus could be considered deserving of acts of brutality? I don't think that people consciously believe this, but still, it's an extremely disturbing implication.

ETA: What the hell?

I came across this Harry/Draco fanvid a couple days ago. Seeing as I've been in something of a fever-induced stupor, I temporarily forgot about it. But then I remembered, and it was so utterly creepy that I had to go back and watch it again. And then I saw that it was inspired by a fic called Dark Side of Light. So of course I had to read it.

After basically infusing my brain with (sort of) WAFFy D/H these past couple days while wearing out my fever, this... I don't even know how to put into words how utterly, beautifully disturbing this is. It's entirely dialogue, but that just somehow makes it so much better, because it's words, all words, spoken and unspoken and meaning everything and nothing at once.

This is darkfic. This is, as weird as it is to consider, the horror bordering between obsession and insanity that I looked for in the Ed/Envy pair while I was still grasping to the FMA fandom. And as strange as it is to find what I was looking for someplace completely unexpected, it's enthralling and I want to hold onto it.

So I'm going to rec this. For those who love darkfic, who love riveting dialogue and psychological horror and post-war mental breakdowns, and even those I know who have a fancy for necro/zombie fics.

"Dark Side of Light" by Maya

Six Ships I Like:

1. Kyle/Stan [south park]
2. Sam/Dean [supernatural]
3. Draco/Harry [harry potter]
4. Ed/Envy [fullmetal alchemist]
5. Ed/Al [fullmetal alchemist]
6. Shigeru/Satoshi [pokemon]

Three Ships I've Abandoned:

7. Yami no Bakura/Ryou [yugioh]
8. Zim/Dib [invader zim]
9. Dwicky/Dib [invader zim]

Three Ships I've Never Liked

10. Roy/Riza [fullmetal alchemist]
11. Harry/Ginny [hary potter]
12. Cartman/Kyle [south park]

Two Ships That Have Piqued My Interest:

13. Chase/Cameron [house]
14. Severus/Lily [harry potter]



1. Why do you dislike #11 so much? (Harry/Ginny)
It just seemed so forced. It goes from Harry saving her ass in book two to her not doing much of anything other than playing Quidditch and following her brothers' and their friends around, and then suddenly he goes from emoing over Cho to being hormonal over his best friend's sister. I just. No. This does not work for me.

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